Monday, May 07, 2007

Spider Man 3

I've not been a huge fan of the Spider Man series. They get a lot of critical notice because they spend more time than any other comic book franchise developing characters. The problem, from my view, is that a lot of that character development comes about through the deployment of cheesy dialogue and mooney, ridiculously broad scenes of emotional catharsis. In this way, Spider Man 3 is pretty much exactly like its predecessors. But, this one is getting hammered by critics. The dialogue is of the same vintage, the relationships have the same semi-hysterical pitch they always have, but what's causing such a backlash is that Spider Man 3 suffers from a wicked case of Villian Creep. Too many goddamn bad guys sharing too little screen time in between the Mary Jane/Peter Parker melodrama. When you're concentrating all of your villianious coolness of a single bad guy, be it a Green Goblin or a Dr. Octopus, that melodrama is forgivable, because it serves a tightly constructed plot. In Spider Man 3, Harry Osborne, Venom and the stupid, goddamn Sandman rub uncomfortably against one another, with Venom criminally underused. I really think that the downfall of the movie is presence of Sandman, also known as Flint Marko, which is one of the porn-iest names in all of comics (and there's a whole lot of competition). Sandman looks cool, but his relationship with Spider Man is non-existent, which is kind of crazy considering the fact that he KILLED UNCLE BEN!* All he does is take vital screen time from Venom, who makes what amounts to a cameo before being dispatched. Get rid of Sandman, significantly shorten the "Bad Spidey" sequence, get that fucking symbiote onto Eddie Brock before the first hour of the movie is over, and maybe you've got something.

Score: 6.5

*also, raped Aunt Jemima

1 comment:

chuibreg said...

The more I think about it, the more this movie had a Phantom Menace effect on me. I really wanted to like this, but it kept taunting me, and making it ultimately impossible. In addition, it had the effect of making the other two flicks seem worse by, as you said, exposing their flaws for what they were. In some ways, though, its worse than the dreaded prequel trilogy; whereas I really don't know how to redo or salvage Episode 1 to make it good (or even justify its existance), it took me about ten minutes to figure out a way to replace Spider-Man 3's plot with one that worked substantially better -- and that's not saying anything about my GALACTIC talent as a filmmaker.

It's gotten to the point that I don't want to see any mention of this movie anymore, because it makes my feelings about it decline every time. At least, save for one important issue:

SYMBIOTES = THUMBS UP